Yogi Berra Quotes

Unleash the wit and wisdom of one of baseball's greatest minds
Written by Mark Bailey
Last updated on

Yogi Berra, a 17-time All-Star catcher, is celebrated both for his exceptional skill on the baseball field and his memorable off-the-field quotes that resonate in popular culture. Dive into this blog post to explore some of Yogi’s timeless sayings that continue to captivate audiences today.

Funny Quotes

“Why buy good luggage? You only use it when you travel.”

“Pie a la mode, with ice cream.”

“You tell the stupidest questions.”

“I’m not going to buy my kids an encyclopedia. Let them walk to school like I did.”

“So I’m ugly. I never saw anyone hit with his face.”

“You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I’m not hungry enough to eat six.”

“It was impossible to get a conversation going, everybody was talking too much.”

“I don’t know (if they were men or women fans running naked across the field). They had bags over their heads.”

“The towels were so thick there I could hardly close my suitcase.”

“A lot of guys go, ‘Hey, Yog, say a Yogi-ism.’ I tell ’em, ‘I don’t know any.’ They want me to make one up. I don’t make ’em up. I don’t even know when I say it. They’re the truth. And it is the truth. I don’t know.”

“Thanks, you don’t look so hot yourself.”

“How long have you known me, Jack? And you still don’t know how to spell my name.”

“I’d find the fellow who lost it, and, if he was poor, I’d return it.”

“No, ma’am, it’s not even carbonated.”

“Mt. Sinus Hospital.”

“When I was young and green behind the ears.”

“I’m not in shape yet.”

“The meat’s too tough and the horns get stuck in my teeth.”

“He was a big clog in their machine.”

“What kind of bird is a cyst?”

“Cut my pie into four pieces, I don’t think I could eat eight.”

“No matter where you go, there you are.”

“I looked like this when I was young, and I still do.”

“[What time is it?] You mean now?”

“Today, if things are going wrong around the house, maybe it’s a good day to work on the lawn or paint the shutters.”

“I gotta shake hands with himǃ That’s one guy I know I’m better lookin’ than.”

“I don’t mean to be funny.”

Baseball Quotes

“Baseball is 90 percent mental. The other half is physical.”

“I’m a lucky guy and I’m happy to be with the Yankees. And I want to thank everyone for making this night necessary.”

“I never blame myself when I’m not hitting. I just blame the bat and if it keeps up, I change bats. After all, if I know it isn’t my fault that I’m not hitting, how can I get mad at myself?”

“It gets late early out there.”

“People seem to find it hard to believe, but I’m a very serious person. It wasn’t luck that I became a ballplayer.”

“He (Bill Dickey) learned me all his experience.”

“If people don’t want to come to the ballpark, how are you going to stop them?”

“If I were playing alone, I would use my ball.”

“In baseball, you don’t know nothing.”

“If you can’t imitate him, don’t copy him.”

“All pitchers are liars or crybabies.”

“He hits from both sides of the plate. He’s amphibious.”

“You wouldn’t have won if we’d beaten you.”

“I wish everybody had the drive he (Joe DiMaggio) had. He never did anything wrong on the field. I’d never seen him dive for a ball, everything was a chest-high catch, and he never walked off the field.”

“Little League baseball is a very good thing because it keeps the parents off the streets.”

“You don’t have to swing hard to hit a home run. If you got the timing, it’ll go.”

“If I didn’t make it in baseball, I won’t have made it workin’. I didn’t like to work.”

“He can run anytime he wants. I’m giving him the red light.”

“90% of the putts that are short don’t go in.”

“It’s never happened in the World Series competition, and it still hasn’t.”

“Swing at the strikes.”

“If we didn’t want to bring him up we might as well have let him stay down.”

“I think Little League is wonderful. It keeps the kids out of the house.”

“A home opener is always exciting, whether it’s at home or on the road.”

“What difference does a uniform make? You don’t hit with it.”

“If you don’t catch the ball you catch the bus home.”

“I’d give my right arm to be ambidextrous.”

“But it don’t bother me. I never yet saw anybody hit the baseball with their face. Besides, I like to get kidded; that means they like me. When they stop kidding me, I’m in trouble.”

“We do everything but punch ’em in the nose and here we are all tied up in the Series. We flatten ’em by scores of 16-3, 10-0 and 12-0 and we still need one more to win. How do you figure that? Don’t write this, but even if they beat us tomorrow, we’re the better club.”

“It’s fun, baseball’s fun.”

“I dunno. This game is getting funnier and funnier.”

“Baseball’s different today, but it isn’t.”

“Pitching always beats batting — and vice-versa.”

“The hitting’s good these days because the pitching isn’t.”

“The game is simple, but it’s never easy.”

Life Quotes

“If the world were perfect, it wouldn’t be.”

“No one goes there anymore. It’s too crowded.”

“We made too many wrong mistakes.”

“Never answer an anonymous letter.”

“The future ain’t what it used to be.”

“I usually take a two-hour nap from 1 to 4.”

“When you come to a fork in the road, take it.”

“Always go to other people’s funerals. Otherwise, they won’t come to yours.”

“We have deep depth.”

“You’ve got to be very careful if you don’t know where you are going, because you might not get there.”

“Even Napoleon had his Watergate.”

“Take it with a grin of salt.”

“I’m lucky. Usually you’re dead to get your own museum, but I’m still alive to see mine.”

“I knew I was going to take the wrong train, so I left early.”

“He must have made that before he died.”

“Texas has a lot of electrical votes.”

“If you don’t know where you are going, you will wind up somewhere else.”

“In theory there is no difference between theory and practice. In practice there is.”

“We’ve had enough trowels and tribulations.”

“You can’t compare me to my father. Our similarities are different.”

“It’s not too far. It just seems like it is.”

“Half the lies they tell about me aren’t true.”

“Little things are big.”

“Why be jealous over things you don’t have?”

“There are a lot of things in life you can’t control, but how you respond to things, that you CAN control.”

“That’s how I kept myself positive, by not getting all negative.”

“There are some people who, if they don’t already know, you can’t tell ’em.”

“Everybody should plan ahead for a time when they die.”

“I guess I’ve got a smart wife.”

“It was a once in a lifetime opportunity, and I’ve had a couple of those.”

Best Quotes

“It ain’t over ’til it’s over.”

“Love is the most important thing in the world, but baseball’s pretty good, too.”

“I always thought that record would stand until it was broken.”

“You can observe a lot by watching.”

“This message won’t be over ’til it’s done.”

“A nickel ain’t worth a dime anymore.”

“It’s deja vu all over again.”

“Slump? I ain’t in no slump… I just ain’t hitting.”

“I never dreamed we’d accomplish so much, but hunger accomplishes a lot of things.”

“It ain’t the heat, it’s the humility.”

“You give 100 percent in the first half of the game, and if that isn’t enough in the second half you give what’s left.”

“The other teams could make trouble for us if they win.”

“Yeah, but we’re making great time!”

“Nobody can be all smiley all the time, but having a good positive attitude isn’t something to shrug off.”

“The game is supposed to be fun. If you have a bad day… don’t worry about it. You can’t expect to get a hit every game.”

“I am… happy to speak my words… A lot of people have been quoting me… But, as I once said, I didn’t really say everything I said. So now it’s my turn. I want to give some of my famous advice to the graduates. First, never give up, because it ain’t over ‘til it’s over. Second, during the years ahead, when you come to a fork in the road, take it. Third, don’t always follow the crowd, because nobody goes there anymore. It’s too crowded. Fourth, stay alert. You can learn a lot by watching. Fifth, and last, remember that whatever you do in life, 90 percent of it is half mental. In closing, I want to quote myself again: Thank you, Montclair State University, for making this day necessary.”

“We’re lost, but we’re making good time.”

“There’s one word that describes baseball: you never know.”

“We have a good time together, even when we’re not together.”

“Baseball is a game of confidence, and over coming failures and fears. That’s what life’s about to.”

“To say that I don’t have any worries or nerves is the opposite of the truth. I worry about not being able to get around on the fast ball any more, I worry about getting hurt and having to quit playing before my time.”

“I try to accomplish something each day.”

Famous Quotes

“I wish I had an answer to that, because I’m tired of answering that question.”

“I can see how he (Sandy Koufax) won 25 games. What I don’t understand is how he lost five.”

“Pair ’em up in threes.”

“(On the 1973 Mets) We were overwhelming underdogs.”

“I want to thank everybody for making this day necessary.”

“I can’t think and hit at the same time.”

“I never said most of the things I said.”

“If you ask me anything I don’t know, I’m not going to answer.”

“Mickey Mantle was a very good golfer, but we weren’t allowed to play golf during the season; only at spring training.”

“Think! How the hell are you gonna think and hit at the same time?”

“Sometimes I think there must be two Yogi Berras. There is the one who grew up on the Hill in St, Louis, who’s been playing ball for the Yankees for fourteen years, has a beautiful wife named Carmen and three boys, Larry, Timmy, and Dale, and lives in a nice house in Montclair, N. J. That’s me. Then there’s the one you read about in the papers who is a kind of a comic-strip character, like Li’l Abner or Joe Palooka. […] I don’t know that Yogi at all, because he doesn’t exist.”

Which one do you like best?

All in all, it’s no wonder why Yogi Berra is such a beloved person in the world of baseball. Time and time again, he has proven to be a talented player on the field, but his enduring wisdom off the field is what also makes him so special. From funny baseball quotes to intelligent life quotes, Yogi Berra has left us much to reflect upon. After reading through this blog post, one can’t help but appreciate just how timeless and applicable his words still are long after his retirement from the diamond.

So whether you’re searching for inspiration or light-hearted laughter, remember the wit of Yogi Berra and never forget: it ain’t over ’til it’s over! Now, what do you think? Do you have a favorite quote that wasn’t included? Let us know by sharing this blog post with friends, family, and followers!

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